Tuesdays with Tyson – March 11, 2008

Hi all! Here is another quote from Mr. Tyson, this time about religion:

“I feel like sometimes that I was born, that I’m not meant for this society because everyone here is a f**king hypocrite. Everybody says they believe in God but they don’t do God’s work. Everybody counteracts what God is really about. If Jesus was here, do you think Jesus would show me any love? Do you think Jesus would love me? I’m a Muslim, but do you think Jesus would love me … I think Jesus would have a drink with me and discuss … why you acting like that? Now, he would be cool. He would talk to me. No Christian ever did that and said in the name of Jesus even … They’d throw me in jail and write bad articles about me and then go to church on Sunday and say Jesus is a wonderful man and he’s coming back to save us. But they don’t understand that when he comes back, that these crazy greedy capitalistic men are gonna kill him again.”

Wow… I’m not sure what that means…

Next week there will be no Tuesday with Tyson… I will be on vacation, but the series will resume the week of the 25th.

Tuesdays with Tyson – March 4, 2008

Here is a real short but powerful one from Iron Mike:

 “I’m on the Zoloft to keep from killing y’all.”

Funny stuff.

Tuesdays with Tyson – February 26, 2008

Well, we had some good quotes from Don King last week, but it is back to Mr. Tyson this week. Without further delay, here is another great quote from Big Mike to a female reporter:

“It’s no doubt that I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don’t do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them, so you shouldn’t talk anymore. Unless you want to… you know.”

 See you next week!

Tuesdays with Tyson – February 19, 2008

This week we have a little bit of a change-up in the form of a couple of quotes from Don King, one of Boxing’s greatest promoters:

“I can’t believe what I said about myself. What I said in my own private conversations with myself to an ESPN producer are my business, and I had no business saying them to someone else.”

Wow, hilarious.

And one of my favorite Don King quotes:

“I can’t believe that having said what I said was interpreted as having been what I said when I said it, because I said it where I said it, when I said it, and who I said it to.“

See you next week!

Tuesdays with Tyson – Feb. 12, 2008

Today’s quote was directed at the media:

 ”If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don’t know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I’ve been on that camera since I was 13 years old.”

Yep, classic Tyson.

Tuesdays with Tyson – Feb. 5th, 2008

Welcome back to another Tuesday with Tyson.

This week features a couple pretty funny ones. No one ever said Mike had perfect grammar or the largest vocabulary!

“I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage.”

“I guess I’m gonna fade into Bolivian.”

What a guy!

Tuesdays with Tyson – Jan. 29th, 2008

It is time for another Tuesday with Tyson!

This week’s quote:

“I paid a worker at New York’s zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin (Mike’s wife). When we got to the gorilla cage there was 1 big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were all so powerful, but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let me smash that silverback’s snotbox! He declined.”

Yep, Mike is always looking out for the zoo animals that are getting bullied. What a guy!

Another quote, this time while speaking to a journalist:

“I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.”

Ouch… I’m not sure I want to feel his pain.

See you next week for more Tuesdays with Tyson!

Tuesdays with Tyson – Follow Up

Well, I received a number of positive notes and comments regarding the ‘Tuesdays with Tyson’ feature, so it will continue every Tuesday from now until I feel like stopping, so be sure to stop in for your weekly dose of everyone’s favorite lunatic boxer.

Tuesdays with Tyson

Some quick background: Throughout middle school and high school I was fascinated by boxing (more specifically, boxers). Let’s face it… combine a couple of angry, amped up muscle heads (with little to no education), a tiny ring enclosed by ropes, and give some prize money to whoever knocks the crap out of the other dude, and you have a recipe for some pretty entertaining stuff.

So from here on out, every Tuesday I will have a quick write up featuring some funny stuff from the world of boxing, often featuring Mike Tyson simply because he is a wealth of material.

Let’s start with a quote from Mr. Tyson himself:

“He called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse’. I’m not a recluse!”

Hilarious stuff.

Another one of my favorites came in an interview while Mr. Tyson was speaking about his childhood:

“One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died. I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand… he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like a infantile retard.”