Tuesdays with Tyson – March 11, 2008

March 12, 2008

Hi all! Here is another quote from Mr. Tyson, this time about religion:

“I feel like sometimes that I was born, that I’m not meant for this society because everyone here is a f**king hypocrite. Everybody says they believe in God but they don’t do God’s work. Everybody counteracts what God is really about. If Jesus was here, do you think Jesus would show me any love? Do you think Jesus would love me? I’m a Muslim, but do you think Jesus would love me … I think Jesus would have a drink with me and discuss … why you acting like that? Now, he would be cool. He would talk to me. No Christian ever did that and said in the name of Jesus even … They’d throw me in jail and write bad articles about me and then go to church on Sunday and say Jesus is a wonderful man and he’s coming back to save us. But they don’t understand that when he comes back, that these crazy greedy capitalistic men are gonna kill him again.”

Wow… I’m not sure what that means…

Next week there will be no Tuesday with Tyson… I will be on vacation, but the series will resume the week of the 25th.

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Tuesdays with Tyson – March 4, 2008

March 4, 2008

Here is a real short but powerful one from Iron Mike:

 “I’m on the Zoloft to keep from killing y’all.”

Funny stuff.


Tuesdays with Tyson – February 26, 2008

February 26, 2008

Well, we had some good quotes from Don King last week, but it is back to Mr. Tyson this week. Without further delay, here is another great quote from Big Mike to a female reporter:

“It’s no doubt that I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don’t do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them, so you shouldn’t talk anymore. Unless you want to… you know.”

 See you next week!


Tuesdays with Tyson – February 19, 2008

February 20, 2008

This week we have a little bit of a change-up in the form of a couple of quotes from Don King, one of Boxing’s greatest promoters:

“I can’t believe what I said about myself. What I said in my own private conversations with myself to an ESPN producer are my business, and I had no business saying them to someone else.”

Wow, hilarious.

And one of my favorite Don King quotes:

I can’t believe that having said what I said was interpreted as having been what I said when I said it, because I said it where I said it, when I said it, and who I said it to.

See you next week!


Tuesdays with Tyson – Feb. 12, 2008

February 12, 2008

Today’s quote was directed at the media:

 “If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don’t know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I’ve been on that camera since I was 13 years old.”

Yep, classic Tyson.


Honey, does the beer have its seatbelt on?

February 6, 2008

Here is another amazing (ridiculous, idiotic) story from today’s news…

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080206/ap_on_fe_st/odd_secured_beer;

_ylt=AjxtOIu87OXObX9xfZkdaJftiBIF

It seems that this lady has her priorities out of order.

If you didn’t read the story, here is a brief summary:

This lady got drunk, had to go for a “beer run”, and couldn’t leave her kid at home alone, so she hopped in the car and went for a drunken drive with her toddler. She arrived at the store, bought a 24 pack of Busch beer (yuck), strapped it into the passenger seat with a seatbelt (just in case), and left the toddler to run wild in the back seat for the drunken drive home.

She was pulled over by a deputy, wouldn’t take a breath test, and they found drug paraphernalia in her possession. She is now jailed with bail set at $31,000. When asked why the beer was buckled up and the kid wasn’t, at least she responded honestly: “I don’t know.”

So basically, she got hammered, went to get more beer, and decided that it was more important to strap in her 24 cans of Busch than her kid. I swear, I couldn’t make this crap up if I had to.

If you are making sure that your brewskis are buckled up, you might have a problem.


Tuesdays with Tyson – Feb. 5th, 2008

February 5, 2008

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Welcome back to another Tuesday with Tyson.

This week features a couple pretty funny ones. No one ever said Mike had perfect grammar or the largest vocabulary!

“I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage.”

“I guess I’m gonna fade into Bolivian.”

What a guy!